Don’t care, gonna make life take the lemons back anyway!

The machine was preprogrammed with over 1000 unique belittlements prerecorded by Cave himself which would play randomly each time a lemon was launched.

First i determine what quality of product i really need so I can shop in that range. Do i need a modern high performance mountain bike, an entry level quality bike, or just a cheap mass produced bike thats good enough for my needs?

Then i do extensive research often reading multiple reviews and articles. I look for whats mentioned most frequently and what isn’t mentioned, also for how consistent things are between reviews. I’m sure some of what i encounter is marketing or bot comments but some may be still legitimate as well.

I also look for guides on what to consider if its something I’m new to so i can compare any stats included with the product. The material and quality of the product can be a big factor as well, generally the better the product the more likely they are to brag about its construction. Are they bragging about a certain reinforcement, weight reduction, or power level?

Looking at the reputation of the retailer can be useful as well. A shoe store with 4.8 star reviews is likely to have better quality and selection of shoes than wal-mart. Sometimes you can sniff out the quality brands this way then find those brands for a better price somewhere online.

Going to a brands website can sometimes give you a hint. Are they proud of their products, have easy to access support and lots of details/downloads available or is all the information vague or poorly translated? A quality brand is more likely to have a quality website but this isn’t always the case, especially for niche products that are being produced by small time businesses like specialty equipment.

Ah yes, The Aperature Laboratories Life Gives You Lemons Launcher, a tool developed to inspire the technicians working on the combustible lemon to work faster.

In hindsight, you could’ve used a bandana for the drips

I tend to mostly browse my local city/regional news, some of which have comments on the articles, which is the cesspool you expect but sometimes entertaining. I’ll comment on some articles on Lemmy but otherwise don’t really participate in social media discussions of news unless a friend specifically messages me an article.