• Hey, give them some credit, they have some diversity - there’s place in europe, new place in europe, mispronounced place in europe, british ruler, catholic saint in spanish, american president, explorer related to america, and of course native american place/tribe, and random native american word

  • In the west coast we typically just used the name of the native tribe we killed in order to take the land.

    • 5 days

      Or the Spanish name from when the Spanish took the land a couple hundred years before.

    • In Oklahoma we just use the name of whatever tribe was forcibly relocated there. Although I know of one town that was named after a misspelling of an indian chief’s name. The Apollo 14 CSM pilot lived there.

    • Yes, I visited Themdamninjuns last time I went through Illinois.

      for the purposes of my joke, many people wouldn’t have known - or cared to know - the names of the local tribes

      I’ve never been through Illinois

      • If you are making multiple asides, the standard approach is to use square brackets within the first parentheses, not double parentheses.

        e.g.

        The dildo was menacing and enormous (likely the biggest I have ever used [nearly 4 feet]).

        • do they explicitly thank the tribe in the prayer?

          i know they’re trying, but it’s kind of ridiculous.

            • i think i’m kind of superimposing the prayers and acknowledgements because (1) the last one i was at was at a church and it was kind of both, (2) i’m a church musician and when all you’ve got is a hammer, and (3) like, statesia. prayers. you know.

              one of my grandfathers was one of the kids stolen from his tribe (fuck if we know which one) by the mormons as part of their Indian Placement Program (theologically they wanted to turn the natives white. don’t get me started). so like, i don’t want to sear all white people with the same brand, but like, sometimes the acknowledgements feel like a bandaid. okay most of the time.

              all i know is it fucked up my grandfather something terrible

  • Sure but calling them Americans is likely, mostly, sorta true but also ignores an important fact… They were Europeans (or near descendants of) calling the places that. Often a place was named that place because it reminded them of home / to honor their parents home.

    Some other notable examples: New Zealand

    São Carlos, Brazil

    Munich, Saskatchewan

    Liverpool, New South Wales

    Nueva York, Colombia

    • Yeah, people from that city or place moved there and named their new home after their old home. There’s a very Dutch area of Michigan with many immigrants from the Netherlands still there. Want to know a couple town names? Holland and Zeeland.

      • Can’t forget Noordeloos, Vriesland, Overisel, Drenthe, and Borculo. Been to Borculo a few times. Lotsa folks with Dutch/Frisian/Low German surnames in the area, including the (in)famously wealthy Van Andel and De Vos families of Grand Rapids.

        Supposedly, the phrase “if you ain’t Dutch, you ain’t much” used to be common here, but I’ve never heard it used unironically. Likely died off with time.

    • Well, Americans citizens were all immigrants, most were European

      • Americans citizens were all immigrants,

        Don’t let ICE read that!

  • And at some places they even reassign them new genders: The coat of arms of Berne Switzerland has a bear with a red penis. The US town: New Berne has a bear without a penis as a coat of arms. This means during the sea transport, Berne’s bear outed themselves as Transgender and changed their sex to a lady-bear. (At least in my head cannon)

    • It would be amazing if they had arrived to the Americas and ask some natives about how they call a place and they said “this? This is New Amsterdam. We don’t know what’s Amsterdam but this is a newer version of it”

      • That sometimes leads to confusing results. When Europeans arrived on the Saint Lawrence river they asked what they called the place. The indigenous people thought they were asking about what the word for village was so told them that word. Then every village they went they thought they were asking the name of the place but were actually asking “is this a village?” and the response was “yes, this is a village.” So that led to the assumption the entire region was called that.

        Yeah so the indigenous word for “village” was “canada”. Woops! When they figured out the mistake it was already on all the maps, so whatever I guess.

      • This reminds me of a story about a French ship that landed someplace, and a native of the area walked down the beach and greeted them, saying “Bonjour.” Shocked that the locals spoke perfect French, the sailors asked “Parlez-vous francais??” and the local, confusedly asked “what did you say?” in the local language.

        As it turns out, both the local language and French had apparently arrived at more or less the exact same word for a greeting by pure coincidence.

      • “It’s called Noo Amsterdam, I don’t know why you think it’s referencing some place we’ve never heard of, it just means big harbor”

    • My ancestors had great names for places. Then the white invaders killed most of us and named our land after their home.

      I think this meme would be better suggested to say white European immigrants to America.

    • Exactly - they weren’t “Americans” yet.

      Let’s name our town “New [someplace we miss back home].”

    • Other than the earliest settlements, most cities in the US were named by people born in North America.

  • When you get to the south west it becomes a place in Mexico which is a place in Spain or straight up just named after a Spanish conquistador.

  • As much as Europeans don’t like it, Americans are your children.

  • There’s a lot of places in America that are named after native American tribes. I guess it’s the least our predecessors could do considering how badly they fucked over and slaughtered the natives.

    • “Yeah, we’re naming this river after you guys in honor of your stewardship of the environment. No, it’s not going to catch on fire or anything like that. How could a river catch on fire?”

    • “Ink, AR” because when it was time to name the town a questionnaire was circulated to solicit suggestions, and the top of the form said “write in ink”. Except not really goddammit.

  • There are also a lot of places that kept the original native names. Not as numerous as the “New [European place]” ones, but enough that you notice.

  • In Québec they were a bit more diverse and also named lots of places after saints.